Michael Sam was so happy to be drafted by the St. Louis Rams this past Saturday that he turned around and kissed his little Italian BF Vito on the lips…on ESPN. And the crowd went wild! All the haters ran to their twitter accounts, including Miami Dolphins safety Don Jones who tweeted “horrible” and “OMG” after the kiss aired. The Dolphins have since made a statement supporting Michael Sam and denouncing Jones’s comments. And Jones of course has apologized and deleted his tweets, but he wasn’t the only “phobe” to sling the hate. Other NFL players piped up, but they were quickly smacked down by both ESPN and the NFL, who have found a bevy of marketing potential in Michael Sam. Notice how every time someone mentions Michael Sam they state that he is gay? Yeah. No one calls out that he’s black, or cute, but they make is a point to say he is gay. “Openly gay football player Michael Sam” might as well be his government name. Michael has become the Kim Kardashian if the NFL and they are going to milk him for all he is worth. Regardless of the hype, history has been made. Congrats to Michael Sam for being the first openly gay draft pick—we say openly because you know half of the NFL is in the closet—and congrats on his italian swirlly swirl.
Married about a year now, Zoe Saldana and Marco Perego have apparently made their first public appearance as a couple. They recently swirled up the red carpet at AOLs NewFronts event. But who the F is this guy? Here is what I’ve uncovered:
1. He’s from Italy and his first steps into America landed him in New York on 104th street. How did he get from Spanish Harlem to Zoe Saldana? That accent I bet.
3. He’s an ex-soccer star. Aren’t they all?
4. He meditates everyday and worked for over a year with a doctor to detox himself and transform his life. Yeah, he’s one of those. I guess it worked though.
5. He tattooed Zoe’s face on his arm. Umm…that’s the kiss of death for any relationship. But I’m going to stay positive.
So he sounds like a unicorn, but so is she. In 2013, Zoe told Allure Magazine that she loves men, but she might end up raising children with a woman. She also called herself androgynous. What? Well, Marco does have long hair. Maybe Zoe likes it when Marco puts his hair up in a ponytail and bakes cookies. Who knows what goes on, but let’s give it up for the androgynous unicorn swirl.
Last year General Mills horrified consumers with its Cheerios commercial featuring an interracial couple and their mixed daughter. The racist out cry was so bad that General Mills killed the commercial. But soon after, GM had a change of heart (nobody bullies GM!) and re-ran the offending commercial, silencing the racists once and for all! (not quite, but GM gained a ton of respect from the non-racist team.)
This year General Mills is going to destroy all the racists with the cuteness of that biracial little girl in a sequel, during the Super Bowl! It’s genius! Chicken wings will drop from mouths and beer will spurt from racist noses. Surely some will faint in their ranch dip when they see so much interracial love on the big screen. You can read a full write-up on the new commercial here.
I can’t wait for game day. When that 30 second ad comes on, I will be standing and clapping loudly!
As someone who is biracial, who champions interracial relationships, and just published an essay on “the swirl,” I should be ecstatic about the whole Kim and Kanye “Kimye”thing. Sadly I can’t stand either of them, which is why it has taken me so long to comment, but as I follow the blogs I can see some positives. Kim has finally found someone as shallow and attention seeking as herself. And Kayne is once again f*cking a walking talking fashion magazine;one full of gloss with no interesting articles or opinions. They are like the black and white Ken and Barbie. I imagine they talk about fashion and…well that’s about it. They are actually perfect for each other, which is so damn hard to find, so congrats to them both.
I was distraught when I heard my fave swirl couple was going to split, but I stumbled upon a ray of light this morning. Celebrity Psychic Barb Powell told Astrochicks.com that she thought they would work it out. Barb even insinuated the reports were a possible publicity stunt. Hmmmmm. I believe the latter. Remember when Seal let Heidi perform with him at the 2008 Victoria Secret fashion show? *cringe* Clearly they are madly in love, because love is blind…and obviously deaf.
Click below for Barb’s full prediction.